Drama.
Good, old fashioned drama.
Since we have been married though, the drama and arguments have lessened. Which is a stark contrast from when we dated. Back then, we liked to keep things at a high "rate of disagreement". There were actually two distinct points in our relationship where we nearly broke up, over areas of very critical importance. What, you ask, were the areas of importance to a 20-year-old Tim and 21-year-old Mel?
Intramural basketball and mashed potatoes (this shows the maturity level we were working with).
Intramural Basketball
Being the clumsy younger sister to an athletically inclined older brother, I have watched my share of youth sporting events. So, when Tim asked me to attend two college intramural basketball games he would be playing in, I agreed begrudgingly. This "Wasn't my first walk around the block", and it took alot for me to muster up enough enthusiasm to attend.
The games took place in a rec center, alongside three other matches. There were no bleachers (or other fans), so I stood on the sidelines next to the other players holding a sign. Yep, holding a sign. Tim had thought it would be cool to have a sign to cheer him on, so I dutifully made one. When the second game came around, remembering the lack of fanfare from the first, I opted to go out to dinner instead. Tim called me later that night and spoke words I hadn't been anticipating: We need to talk.
Sitting In Car with Somber Tim:
Me: So....
Tim: I am very disappointed in you. (Nose in the air, looking out the window.)
Me: Wait. What are you talking about? Why?
Tim: You did not come to my basketball game.
Me: The intramural one? (I thought he may have been talking about an Xbox game.)
Tim: Yes. It was very important to me. (Head shaking)
Me: (giggling) Are you being serious?
Tim: Yes. Why did you not come?
Me: I decided to go out to dinner with a friend instead.
Tim: This is the most upset I have ever been in my whole life. You really let me down.
Me: (baffled). I'm sorry...I had no idea that intramural basketball was so...important to you. I will remember that next time.
Tim: There won't ever be another game for you to watch me play!
This conversation took place about 10 years ago and if you are wondering why I can recall it so well, it's because it was the most puzzling conversation I have ever had. Other than asking me to go to these games, Tim had never expressed interest in me viewing him participate in anything other than watching him play Xbox. But, lesson learned, I guess.
Mashed Potatoes
There are two types of people in this world. Those who allow others to eat from their plate and those who prefer not to cross contaminate, risking illness and infection. Unsurpringly, I fall into the latter category. Tim does not share my beliefs and this is where our problem began.
We were out to eat, disagreeing about something I am unsure of at the moment. What I am sure of, is that it was a tense meal and we both sat stubbornly and silently eating our food.
I had ordered the meatloaf and mashed potatoes and was actually enjoying it, despite my displeasure with my co-diner. Tim was trying to continue to discuss whatever the issue had been, and (being the older, more mature one) I ignored him. I wouldn't speak a word to the poor boy. What happened next was catastrophic:
Tim reached over and stuck his fork in my mashed potatoes.
It may not sound bad now, but it was bad. Very, very bad. I proceeded to hand Tim the rest of my food, get up from the table and walk out the door. I wandered around the adjacent mall, wondering "How can I continue to date him, if he can't even respect my potatoes?".
Needless to say it never happened again.
So, I guess the take away from this is, considering how seriously we took these trivial topics, we really deserved one another.
Really.
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